• Confessions of a Buried Survivor
  • My Incessant Bitching
    • In General
    • Catholic Edition
  • Fiction
    • Poetry
    • Superhurt
    • Your Childhood Was Lies
    • All Our Racist Stories
    • Other
  • Support My Work

TheModestBloggist

~ The opposite of a regret, is a story.

TheModestBloggist

Tag Archives: Procreation

I’m Pro-Choice and So is the Virgin Mary

15 Wednesday Nov 2017

Posted by shieldingc in Catholic Edition, Uncategorized

≈ 3 Comments

Tags

Abortion, abstinence, angel, angels can't read minds, annulment, Annunciation, authority, Be it done unto me according to your word, Behold, bible, biological material, Birth Control, blaspheme, bodily autnomy, Bodily Autonomy, bodily integrity, body, born, Catechism, Catholic, Catholic Church, cesarean, chastity, Childbirth, Christ, compromise, conceive, conceived, Conception, consent, consent to pregnancy, corpses, crime, criminal, cycle, dead body, deadly, death, death penalty, deceased, desecration, dignity, disabling mutilation, disposable, donor body, double effect, dying, ecclesiastical, ectopic, Embryo, erroneous Catholic teaching, euthanasia, evil, exception, excommunication, experimentation, explicit consent, exploitation, exploited, fallopian tube, fallopian tubes, feminism, fertility, fetus, fifth commandment, flesh, force, Gabriel, gestation, giving birth, God saves, God's will, Gospel, health, hierarchy, Holy Spirit, hormonal, humility, I am the handmaid of the Lord, illness, impact, implantation, indulgence, infallible, intellect, intent, Jesus, John, just war, late-term, legitimate defense, lethal force, life, life begins, Life-at-conception, life-threatening, love, Luke, Luke 1:26-38, Maria Goretti, Marriage, Mary, medical, medical rights, medicine, misogyny, moderate, most high, Mother of God, natural, natural order, nine months, No word from God will ever fail, openness to life, Organ Donation, ovulation, personhood, precious, Pregnancy, Pregnant, pregnant people, Prejudice, priest, Privacy, Pro-Choice, Pro-Life, Procreation, proportionate, proportionate force, Rape, rapist, Religion, reproduction, respect for the person, risk, sacred, science, scientific research, secular, self-defense, servant, sexism, Sexual assault, sexual predator, sexuality, Silence, sin, soldier, speak for God, Suicide, termination, the Church is in error, The Kingdom, theology, unborn, uterus, vestments, viability, Violent, virgin, virgin girl, Virgin Mary, virtue, warlord, woman, word made flesh, word of God, Zechariah, Zechariah's silence, Zygote, zygotes

Regarding the issue of abortion, the Catholic Church is in error.

It is no blaspheme to say so.  Theological standards require that infallible doctrine apply to the entire Church, and never target an individual or a particular group of people.  The Church’s pronouncements against abortion, however, remove rights deemed universal exclusively from the pregnant.

The error applies specifically to abortion conducted before the point of viability, or the point at which a fetus is developed enough to live unattached to another human being.  This error, in other words, applies to the vast majority of intentional termination.

Post-viability abortion is intrinsically different, in terms of both impact and intent.

In terms of intent, the person who has voluntarily endured six months or more of pregnancy is demonstrably planning to give birth.  Personally (and legally, in almost every location) it would take nothing short of a calamitous prognosis at this point to convince doctors and parents that death is the best course of action.  Most commonly, it is a fetal health anomaly guaranteeing the unborn a short life of struggle and pain, or a life like perpetual coma, without hope of interaction.  In these cases, the end of pregnancy is incidental to the situation, not the ultimate goal.

Late-term abortion, in other words, is not abortion.  It is euthanasia.

Though comprising a very small proportion of intentional termination, post-viability abortion is predominantly singled out by pro-life literature.  Images of women with pronounced pregnant bellies, terms like “fetus,” and references to dismemberment are common indicators that the protester believes all abortions occur late-term.  To make the case against it, some present graphic descriptions of the removal of the deceased’s body out-of-context, as though the unborn was killed in a manner without parallel.  However, the method of death is, as prescribed with every act of euthanasia, lethal injection.  The remains are collected in the manner least dangerous to the pregnant person (as is also the case with late-term miscarriage).

In terms of impact, there may be few circumstances where post-viability abortion occurs in defense of life, as gestation can usually be ended by an induced, non-lethal early labor involving the same degree of risk for the pregnant person as a late-stage termination.

Abortion pre-viability, however, constitutes the lowest threshold of force for the removal of risk from one person at the expense of another. It therefore constitutes legitimate self-defense and cannot be infallibly condemned.

Contrary to what has been claimed by some who are pro-life, pregnancy and childbirth always include a very real risk of dying.  This is why people tend to give birth under the direct supervision of medical professionals who keep sterilized surgical equipment at the ready, and it is why, throughout gestation, doctors carefully monitor the pregnant person’s health.  Pregnancy can cause spiking and plummeting blood pressure, deadly clots, strokes, and heart-attacks.  Hormone-related psychosis, depression, and other disorders which (because of pregnancy) are not treated with prescription pills have even taken their share of lives via suicide.  Everyone who died giving birth or under the cesarean knife would have lived had they instead chosen a safe, legal abortion during the typical first trimester.

Nor is there any knowing in advance who will die.  Every pregnant one is risking death.  Hence, every pregnant person is entitled to defend her own life in this manner.

Contrary to what some may argue specifically in this context, we are not obliged to shrug off risk to our own lives as unimportant when demise is not guaranteed.  Nor are we expected to defend ourselves in a haphazard fashion; a less-than-certain hazard of death does not require a defense that is less-than-certain to kill.  A moderate use of force requires rather that we are to employ in our own defense nothing in excess of the force required to remove the risk of death.  Up until viability, lethal force is the minimum amount necessary to ending the pregnancy; hence, abortion is the moderate use of force.

Some do not like the categorization of abortion as self-defense for the reason that they would rather not place the unborn in the same category as any violent criminal.  This, however, is bias – and it undermines one of the Catholic Church’s foundational teachings.  That is, all people are equally, incalculably, precious.  When removed from battle, a child-soldier, blameless and vulnerable, is to be shown the same mercy as the commanding warlord.  The rights of others dictate, however, that while posing an active threat, either might be killed in self-protection.

Legitimate defense is not a proclamation of guilt, nor a dismissal of human value.  No crime makes a person unworthy of living.  It is simply the Church’s position that when two lives are in conflict, neither is obligated to forfeit for the good of the other.  As the Catechism states, “one is bound to take more care of one’s own life than of another’s.”

The fact that the Church classifies abortion as a special kind of sin, resulting in instant excommunication for the pregnant person and doctors involved, emphasizes the targeted and discriminatory nature of this teaching.  Unlike the soldier joining, in good faith, what seems to be a Just War, or the sovereign who orders the death of a citizen in pursuit of societal safety, the woman who is pregnant and chooses abortion (along with those who serve her) are presumed to be acting with mal intent and operating without the fellowship of the Holy Spirit.  The demonstrable good of her continued existence on this planet is not considered, or else is worth nothing, such that abortion is purported evil by nature.

In cases where the error of this assumption are glaring, Catholic thinkers have exercised mental acrobatics to deny it the medical context proclaimed by secular feminism.

In an ectopic pregnancy, where the embryo is found developing without a uterus, it is clear that termination will save the life of the pregnant person, and that the unborn will otherwise not have long to live.  Still, the preservation of one of those lives can only be accomplished by such pretended accident as might require, for instance, the removal of a woman’s fallopian tube.

In impact and action, this is abortion.  A willing deed ends one life early and saves another.  But, by a discriminating twist of logic, it is reasoned that intending the action that will certainly cause death is not the exact same thing as intending the death itself.  So this is not abortion.

But it would be, if the embryo were removed through a tubal incision small enough to heal.

We see by this example that a condemnation of abortion requires that sanctity of heart and mind not meant to be trespassed, even by angels, to be plastered over with assigned purpose.  Neither the woman seeking an abortion nor the doctors helping her are granted the privacy of their own intentions.  For them, and only for them, benign intent must be externally demonstrated in order to exist.  What satisfies the Church that they mean well, furthermore, is singularly the removal of a piece of her body.  This is nothing but abortion pre-absolved – by the sacrifice of one’s fertility and the physical assurance of her lifelong suffering.  It is an ordered corruption of indulgence.

Denying pregnant people their medical rights in order to maintain that abortion is wrong does nothing to disprove the medical nature of abortion.  If sin cannot be justified by the avoidance of harm, then sin cannot be required as a condition for the avoidance of sin.  Non-therapeutic amputations, mutilations, and sterilizations are explicitly-listed sins against bodily integrity.  In this context, the removal of an entire fallopian tube is all of the above.

Consideration for respect of the person and scientific research led the Church to rule concretely that it is “not morally admissible to bring about the disabling mutilation or death of a human being, even in order to delay the death of other persons.”  As the best possible outcome of tubal removal for an ectopic embryo is the delay of death, such mutilation serves no ethical purpose.  In removing a pregnant person’s risk of death entirely,  however, direct abortion is an application of legitimate defense – in keeping with the fifth commandment and the spirit of defending life.

Nor is respect for the person to be undermined in the interests of saving life.  The donation of one’s bodily organs is hailed by the Church as an act of love and compassion, but is “not morally acceptable” if the donor has not issued explicit consent.

Even when the donor body is no longer alive, and sharing of its parts endangers no one, it must be unambiguously established that the deceased had intended donation.  In condemning abortion, the Church has established that the dead possess more rights than the living pregnant person.  For, as has been pointed out, every act of pregnancy requires the donation of one’s organs and the accompanying compromise of one’s health.

Symptoms of a typical pregnancy would certainly be termed illness – and often severe illness – if experienced by any category other than the pregnant.  Nine months is a long time to be so incapacitated, but many of these symptoms, such as tooth decay, have permanent effects.  Childbirth and the major abdominal surgery known as cesarean sections are, of course, objectively damaging in the best of circumstances and require many weeks and months of medical recovery.  Very often the person bringing life into the world sustains serious injuries rarely acknowledged.  Tissue damage may result in enduring painful intercourse, lost libido, or incontinence.  Irreparable pelvic fractures are also very common.

Explicitly, the Church holds as the organizing principle for the regulation of human bodies, the fifth commandment.  The value of life.  But where it is not argued that the individual is the appointed guardian of her own life, and it has not been established that the insides of our bodies are as private or as sacred as the insides of our minds, it is taken for granted that violations of body are wrong for the reason that they go against a certain order established by the Church.

Consent does not justify medical experimentation enacted voyeuristically.  Consent is not the baseline for determining what constitutes a desecration of the dead.  The Church establishes the order, and in so doing, places the human body firmly under its own jurisdiction.  Ecclesiastical authority can say that pregnancy does not violate its integrity – even when bones break, muscles tear, and hearts stop.  Even when the person who is pregnant does not will it, and is screaming for it to end.  There can be no violation because, as regards the pregnant, it has established that this is what their bodies are for and this is what their lives are for.

The fact that sexual assault appears in the section of the Catechism listing sins against chastity, rather than those entailing sins against health, freedom, bodily integrity, or respect for the person, speaks further to this troubling assumption: it is the business of the Church to regulate, not the pure morality of how people treat one another, but the material usage of bodies.  With relation to all things sexual, it is human reproduction the establishment seeks to command.

This is why, though it was never acceptable to kill an attempting rapist, it was once taught as valiant to kill yourself in the event that you were a virgin girl who otherwise would be raped.  Saint Maria Goretti, who died fighting off a sexual predator, is still commemorated at the pulpit for “defending her virtue unto death.”

What sole, unspoken virtue could there be in a young woman’s death – except the prevention of a baby, whose very existence outside the bounds of sacrament would sully institution?

It is not by reasoning, but by the default prejudice known to feminists as “sexism” that we have always determined something in a woman more precious than her life.  And by that same determination, we have reduced what life may be within her to exploited, “disposable biological material,” however hard we preach to the contrary.

When we include those zygotes who fail to implant, three-quarters of all persons conceived are never born.  That the Church nevertheless will demand unprotected sex between married persons is a valuation unexamined.  It states that an infant is worth the sacrifice of every life lost in utero.  In the Church’s eyes, the born child is worth more – by far – than the zygote or the embryo.

The Church’s teachings against birth control further are a statement that allegiance to natural order as defined by institution are of greater import than human life or dignity.  Science informs us, in fact, there are many more zygotes lost in the course of natural ovulation cycles than could be in the storied event of breakthrough ovulation, as it may occur within wombs too thinned by hormonal birth control to sustain life.  Assuming hormonal birth control even does thin the uterine lining and hinder implantation.  The jury is still out.

So, too, the teachings on marriage requiring openness to life, while maintaining that perpetual abstinence is sin.  A discovery that one partner entered the union with no willingness to have children qualifies a union for annulment – a disavowal that true love ever existed.  In pursuit of procreation, the Church makes the statement – never mind the fact that Jesus’ parents followed quite a different model – that this is what your marriage is for. This is what your love is for.

This is the context by which abortion is without conceivable merit.  The great evil is not death – for all lives are equal and every child born requires the risk of another.  What rankles so is the insubordination; the fact – the known fact – that a pregnant person made a choice about it.

Let it rankle and be known, however – the Virgin Mary is pro-choice.

It says so in the bible.

In Luke’s gospel, the angel Gabriel does not frame it as question, but fact – that Mary the virgin will be overshadowed by the power of the Most High, will become pregnant and will give birth to a baby, whose job it will be to save all the people of God. (Luke 1:26-38).  The Annunciation ends with Gabriel’s insistence that no word from God will ever fail.

Mary tells him, “Behold, I am the handmaid of the Lord.  Be it done unto me according to your word.”

This is not a yielding, simple, sweet agreement.  Mary’s first word is the literal demand – look at me.  And, contrary to what most think, that line about being the handmaid of the Lord is anything but self-dismissal.  For context, we need to look at the story immediately before the Annunciation – the one where Gabriel appears to Mary’s cousin, Zechariah.

Line by line, this conversation (Luke 1:5-20) reads as a foil for the second.  Both visits begin with Gabriel suddenly appearing, telling the human not to be afraid, and proclaiming a boy will be born to change the fate of the world.  In both cases, the human wants to know how it is even possible to expect a baby, given how old he is on the one hand and how unmarried she is on the other.

It is in answer to Zechariah’s skepticism that the angel self-identifies as a servant of God, whose words reflect God’s will.  Then Gabriel tells the old man that, because he failed to believe the angel’s words, he will be silent until the prophecy comes true.  (Accordingly, Zechariah can not speak again until he supports his wife in naming their baby John.)

When they come from an angel or a man in gleaming vestments, claims of serving God are hailed as proof of a special proximity to heaven.  He uses this claim to imply that he, better than others, is able to decipher the Lord’s will.  And if no word from God will fail, speaking for God makes one infallible.

But enter the maiden – poor and young.  Never having commanded angelic legions in heaven’s defense, and making no claims to any standing in divine presence.  She is bold for no reason – except faith.  Where Zechariah was shut up by Gabriel’s humble-brags of higher service, Mary makes the angel look her in the eyes.  Mary speaks of her own service to God.  And Mary tells the angel famously, “Be it done unto me according to your word.”

So active and forceful is her consent – practically a command – the annunciation is painted as a sort of proposal in most biblical interpretations.  But she answered a question that was never asked.  By her yes, Mary asserts, against the angel’s presumption, that she has the right to say no.

This is a stand that flies in the face of erroneous Catholic teaching.  The girl is not consenting to sexual activity that may or may not lead to pregnancy.  She is consenting to her pregnancy in the moment after learning there is a person – with a name, a gender, and a destiny – whose life depends on her.

Mary’s faith in God was not the type of faith that could be blinded.  She could not be silenced, like Zechariah, because she believed no word from God would ever fail – and if the word of God was in the angel who served her , she knew the word of God was in her own voice, too.

Mary’s love for God was not the type of love that would let her forget the dignity of her own person.  So she told the angel yes, even though she wasn’t asked.

It was in that very act of choosing that Christ was made, before the angel’s eyes, from a perfect foretold prophecy to a person of flesh, who might be denied.  Without that yes in honor of his mother’s personhood, there could be no honor given to the personhood of Christ.

Let Mary teach us, in a spirit of humility, to halt our quest for The Kingdom where it causes us to tramp beyond the veil of a breathing human’s flesh.  We do not honor children by removing from their parents such rights as we still give to corpses.

Share this:

  • Twitter
  • Facebook
  • Reddit
  • Tumblr
  • Pinterest
  • LinkedIn

Like this:

Like Loading...

I Don’t Need Abortion

06 Friday Nov 2015

Posted by shieldingc in Pro-Choice Shorts

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

Abortion, abstinence, Babies, horny, keep your legs closed, logical conclusion, no-risk, Pregnancy, Pro-Choice, Pro-Life, Procreation, recreational sex, safe sex, sex, sex-ed, what if

Emily and John have opted to take the most responsible course of action in family planning possible. So why does their marriage not feel ideal?

 

.

.

.

 

To read this story and 20 more, look for Consider An Abortion by Shielding C – on sale now for $2.99 on Amazon!

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B0189C4S7Q?*Version*=1&*entries*=0

Share this:

  • Twitter
  • Facebook
  • Reddit
  • Tumblr
  • Pinterest
  • LinkedIn

Like this:

Like Loading...

Peoples Bank

23 Friday Jan 2015

Posted by shieldingc in Other Outrageous Fiction

≈ 1 Comment

Tags

Abortion, Betty White, Birth Control, Childbirth, Gender Inequality, Genetic Manipulation, Geneticists, George Takei, Government, Human Evolution, Mutants, Prejudice, Procreation, Racism, Reproductive Health, Sex Education, Superpowers

It was a man’s idea, I think. Technically, actually, they say that you could trace it to a woman, but I’m sure she was being sarcastic about it. The man was the one who went and took it serious. They were arguing about abortion. The lady said, “If you were the one who had to be pregnant, you’d feel differently about it.” The man said, “If I could, I would, gladly!” The woman said, “Do it, then! Go invent yourself a mechanical womb and fucking do it!” And he ended up being a rich guy, and he actually did have one invented.   Then he implanted it in a number of people like himself, to prove his point, and it became famous, and then whenever men talked about abortions women gleefully told them why didn’t they go implant themselves with a fetus and get some skin in the game.  And some of the men were sincere, and they did, and lots of them were pressured into it because they didn’t want to look like hypocrites. And some of the men who did it just to prove a point carried the babies to term and had the mechanical womb tear open holes in their abdomen when the kid was ready to come out. The mechanical wombs had water-tight fabric walls, so the men could feel the babies squishing up against their other organs and pounding against their bellies indignantly. Some of the men who got implanted then went and had abortions, and when this happened lots of people said it went to show how hard that women had it that whole time. Some women had to foot the bill, to prove their point. People didn’t like it when one guy who had an abortion went on the news and told people he hadn’t changed his mind at all, and been proven wrong – in fact he only got pregnant in the first place so he could get his own abortion and to prove that it was no big deal at all. And they started inventing fetus transplants where pregnant people could just have their fetuses sucked out and implanted in people that volunteered their wombs. You’d have thought that would have solved everything, and it did. But that’s when it started to be a serious thing instead of mainly funny, and somebody invented a machine with glass tubes that grew babies in the wall, and nobody had to be pregnant if they didn’t want to anymore. If someone got pregnant they’d just make a deposit. And then people started talking and decided really after all nobody wanted to be pregnant again, ever, and so they started making deposits of sperm and eggs when they wanted to make a baby. For awhile you had to pay money to do it, and they called it Peoples Bank, but then people said it should be something for everyone and the government started paying for it.   They were more efficient about it, so no accidental pregnancies ever happened in the first place – 90% of women in the U.S. got themselves sterilized by having all their eggs sucked out in their youths and stored up in the Peoples Bank where they could keep fresh and secure.  Men, too, could make a one-time sperm donation while they were young and healthy.  Then when it became something absolutely everyone was doing, the government had people undergo a year-long purge in youth before making the deposit, where they avoided alcohol and drugs and exercised and read great works and practiced languages and other important skills so as to program their mitochondrial DNA ideally, then at the height of their physicality they banked all their eggs or sperms. The government offered free services to these young people, like vouchers for the theater and gym and sports programs, army training, or free non-credit bearing classes at any university, depending on who in any particular term was in office and what kind of grandkids they wanted. Once you’d donated your perfect genes, you could monitor them online. As with the old phonebooks, you could pay extra money to have your sperm or eggs unlisted, and then no one else could use them. Or you could reserve a few cells for yourself. When the bank first went live, people were very suspicious of other people wanting their sperms and eggs, but the Bank became socialized by degrees, as people with inferior genes began looking at Olympic athletes and geniuses with IQ’s over 200 and movie stars with luscious lips and then envy overtook vanity – people wanted kids who were better, disease-free, capable of living to 105 with all their wits about them. The process was so swift and efficient anyway, people stopped feeling schmaltzy about it. You’d order your baby online with your credit card, pairing your preferred sperm and egg, and it would gestate in a glass tube, with ten or twelve babies clustered to the main line like grapes on a vine. You’d have to wait nine months for your order to come in, then you’d get a call that your baby was ready for pickup, and you’d drive down to the bank and a guy with gloves would pluck your fetus off its mechanical vine and run it through the dryer and then they’d hand it to you through their little window after you’d signed the paperwork. Sometimes people picked all the same awesome traits for the sperm and the egg and concocted incest babies by accident, and the parents would realize their mistake sometime after ordering or sometime when their kid got bigger, but then they’d just not say anything to anyone about it. Racism stopped being a thing because no one could figure out what race anyone belonged to after a few generations of white-guilt-feeling people making sure to order at least one minority baby and with some oppressed-feeling non-white people making sure to order all white babies so as to increase their babies’ odds of getting ahead. No one cared about what race anybody’s grandparents were anymore. That was a big relief to everyone, like it was when sexism died because no one had to be pregnant. People still talked about cultural prejudice, but none of those debates had the same zing as the ones about racism.  Then some stupid hipsters every once in awhile would order babies who had autism or schizophrenia genes because they worried about the extinction of rare creative traits and everyone else hated those people and said they were so stupid for ignoring all the advances made by modern medicine and making crazy people for the future. Then people started to complain because after a few generations 50% of the eggs and sperm were descended from Betty White or George Takei and then the contest became to see who come make the least incesty-babies with what they had left in the bank, but a lot of the time people just had to settle for everybody having relatives for kids. Then the government made bans on people choosing their own eggs and sperm and had professional geneticists pick out the best combinations when people ordered their babies, checking off boxes for the kinds of genes they wanted. And when a couple of parents wound up with downs-syndrome babies and had the tests taken that proved it, the parents complained and the geneticists who did that got fired. And when people heard about that, suddenly there were a couple thousand parents who had children that were seriously fucked up, like, kids with vestigial tails that had to be removed, and kids with webbed feet, and kids who would sputter gibberish incessantly and had gross noses and who moved weird and glowed in the dark and shot lasers from their eyes, and the parents finally could admit it out loud that they’d been disappointed with the quality of their children, and then those parents started to sue the geneticists and a good handful of them won, so it became a running joke in everybody’s family when the kids were bad, “This is why geneticists get sued.” Then some person released a manifesto where they said that what had happened with those weird gross babies was because some of the people who didn’t believe in the morality of the Peoples’ Bank had gone in to donate sperm with hidden sacs of gorilla semen or pig semen. And then everybody was horrified and people said it was Christian nutjobs and that started a huge anti-Christian thing, but some other people said it was the same hippie nutjobs who tried to save schizophrenia and autism and you could only blame one of those groups for all the gross babies that people were having. Then another guy released a manifesto where he said actually that what happened was that people who were mad scientist-y geeks and wanted to create mermaids and angels and x-men had gone in to donate sperm with hidden sacs of electric eel and eagle seamen. And one guy added that he’d wanted to create leaf-people and had sprinkled pollen into his real sperm.  So when it came out that the culprits of crappy kids were all men, sexism came back a little. When parents were fighting over how crappy their kids were women accused men of slipping their geneticist crap sperm, and even though it was probably some other guy’s sperm anyway in the abstract the concept was the same – what goes around comes around, if your kid got bastardized it must’ve been because you bastardized some other poor bloke’s eggs first. And people started to talk about the fact that whenever young men went to make deposits to the sperm bank no one was watching them extract their sperm. Other people said it shouldn’t matter because the geneticists should be able to tell monkey seamen from man seamen, but nobody who wasn’t a geneticist knew if that was true. Then it turned out in a few years that all you really needed the government for was the Peoples’ bank, since racism and overpopulation and orphans and abortion were over with, and as long as there wasn’t any bunny jizz involved there wouldn’t be much fuss about health-care or education because all the people would be naturally healthy and smart. Congress had made a law, specifically to keep the bunny jizz out of circulation, that none of the people with animal fathers could make any deposits to Peoples’ bank when they came of age. And when those people did finally come of age, they found out by accident that those mutants with wombs could still get pregnant. That started a whole big thing again, because first of all no one could remember what to do when people got pregnant, and that was creepy for ordinary people to be around mutants and to see their giant swollen bellies and to hear them say disgusting things like, “Oh, it’s kicking!” And second of all, everyone had expected the mutant situation to go away on its own. But now the mutants were breeding, right there in front of everyone, and it seemed like a situation everyone should deal with. But it was kind of a delicate subject, what with no one sure who anyone’s parents were and you couldn’t just have sex with whoever you wanted to, anymore, when you started calling people mutants. But some of them were getting pregnant, and that had to be proof positive that someone was a mutant who you’d been sleeping with. But some people still didn’t want to admit it and wound up marrying the mutants and having more babies who were mutants.   Some mutants also got married to mutants, and because you both knew you were mutants together and didn’t care how strange you were. So really if you were a mutant you had pretty good chances of getting pregnant. But still, people said that there were lots of mutants who couldn’t find anyone who wanted to have sex and one day all those mutants had a convention where they did moving speeches to show people how wrong it was for them to be discriminated against at the Peoples’ Bank, about how it hurt to be labeled a reject, and so what if your father was an electric eel and you could do special things like start a car with your fingers, didn’t that make you cool? And then someone in the audience started levitating to prove the point, and someone else started spinning like a top on its head, saying yeah, everyone was being mean. And a guy who had a thick stream of mucous streaming out of his nose and had to catch it in buckets said that his daddy was a snail, but nobody wanted to listen to him because he was proving the opposite of their point. And they found more and better kinds of mutants who could jump really far across rooftops while carrying people on their shoulders or who could see in the dark and find lots of things for other people when it was nighttime to show that it was better to be different. And then that worked, and everyone started looking for mutants, and it became a really big thing where anyone who said they were a mutant would have a line of people start to form who’d masturbated into baggies and wanted to make deposits. At first the mutants just laughed or got angry and told them all to go away, but then some of the people who wanted mutant babies were paying money, and then lots and lots of mutants came out and were accepting applications for sperms in baggies. Some of them would accept more than one candidate at a time, but then people got mad when only one mutant baby came out, or two sometimes, and they had to fight about who was the rightful owner, and they tried to hire geneticists who could tell them, but geneticists were even harder to find than mutants had been – they’d all gone into hiding after the first ones got sued for effing up. And some of the mutants who accepted deposits still didn’t get pregnant, and that was an even worse mess because people got angry and got into fights and then they were looking for the government again. The government had been busy trying to figure out why no one was ordering any new babies, and it was because everyone was ordering their babies offline instead, with their cool new mutant friends. Then finally someone in the government wrote a paper and read it out loud over microphones where they said that the mutants didn’t actually have anything to do with people having animal fathers, it was just geneticists making mistakes or pairing the right traits to make evolution happen faster, with superpowers, and so they added a little check-box to the applications for people ordering babies who wanted special kinds of animal powers. And they said that they couldn’t verify the mutant status of everyone who said they were mutants, because after all the mess with fathers getting blamed all the time for having bad sperm, making deposits had become kind of a trashy thing to do, and it turned out that a lot of communities had stopped their young people making their one-time donation to the Peoples Bank. And that was complicated and a problem, because people hadn’t been paying attention to peoples’ genders for really a very long time, and all the people now had names like Storm and Truth that you couldn’t tell what their genders were and lots of people who were having sex were doing free-love and when they had preferences for the shape of peoples’ orifices and projections it was just as unimportant as having a preference for people with certain colored hair or eyes, or certain kinds of heights or weights, and so people had lost track of who could get pregnant and who couldn’t. Actually when people blamed the fathers for slipping the geneticist crap sperm, it was just a guess and when people talked about some people being men or women it was just a thing that people said, like having cooties, that nobody knew what it meant but that they just kept saying. And so most of the mutants who were getting pregnant actually were just women. And, in conclusion, that’s what led to the politics of sex education in America.

C+

Bibliography needed.

Share this:

  • Twitter
  • Facebook
  • Reddit
  • Tumblr
  • Pinterest
  • LinkedIn

Like this:

Like Loading...

Subscribe

  • Entries (RSS)
  • Comments (RSS)

Archives

  • January 2018
  • December 2017
  • November 2017
  • October 2017
  • September 2017
  • August 2017
  • July 2017
  • June 2017
  • May 2017
  • February 2017
  • January 2017
  • December 2016
  • October 2016
  • September 2016
  • August 2016
  • July 2016
  • June 2016
  • May 2016
  • April 2016
  • March 2016
  • February 2016
  • January 2016
  • December 2015
  • November 2015
  • October 2015
  • September 2015
  • August 2015
  • July 2015
  • June 2015
  • May 2015
  • April 2015
  • March 2015
  • February 2015
  • January 2015
  • November 2014
  • October 2014
  • September 2014

Categories

  • Biography
    • Confessions of a Buried Survivor
    • Stories Women Never Tell
  • Fiction
    • All Our Racist Stories
    • Other Outrageous Fiction
    • Poetry
    • Superhurt
  • Opinion
    • Catholic Edition
    • General
    • My Incessant Bitching
  • Pro-Choice Shorts
  • This Week's Installment
  • Uncategorized
  • Your Childhood Was Lies

Meta

  • Register
  • Log in

Blog at WordPress.com.

%d bloggers like this: